But Jesus was saying, “Father, forgive them;
for they do not know what they are doing.” And they cast lots, dividing up his
garments among themselves.
—Luke 23:34
The root
cause of hate, I believe, is the lack of forgiveness. We must forgive. If we
are unable to forgive, the hateful feelings will destroy us.
Not
forgiving separated me from God. How could I feel forgiven by God if I was
unwilling to extend that same forgiveness to someone else? Even if I said in my
heart, “I forgive my ex-husband,” my lack of forgiveness would re-emerge later
when something triggered the return of painful memories. I couldn’t get
forgiveness to stick. I soon realized I had to commit to the process of
forgiveness—a lifestyle, a mindset, a choice. Every time I started to become
bitter, I had to go through the process of forgiveness all over again. In my
case, forgiveness took me a long, long time.
Without
the Holy Spirit’s help, I would not have been able to forgive my ex-husband. Fortunately,
after a period of time, I realized my love for God was greater than my
bitterness and regret over mistakes I had made in the marriage—strong enough to
overcome my intense sadness and depression. Through God’s love and power, I was
at last able to forgive completely.
Our
model for forgiveness is Jesus Christ. Jesus forgave us as he hung naked on a
cross. We don’t deserve his forgiveness or grace. He simply loved us that much.
We deserve to die and pay the price for all the mistakes and sins we have
committed, but instead, Jesus died and paid the price for us.
There’s
nothing more powerful than seeing someone who has been hurt exercise his will
to forgive. If we choose to hate, the devil will be our master. If we choose to
follow the example that Jesus set for us, we will love, and he will be our
master. To love in these circumstances is not a feeling. It’s a choice.
*~*~*~*~*~*
From
Seventh Dimension – The Door, a Young
Adult Christian Fantasy:
“I’m nothing more than a worm, like that worm
lying on the sidewalk that Judd wanted to crush. There’s nothing good inside me
except that which was put there by the king. Just as I rescued that worm from
his tormenter, my king will rescue me, too, and crush your head [the serpent].
The king promised, if you forgive others, your heavenly Father will also
forgive you. I am forgiven.”
—Shale
Snyder, chapter thirty-five
*~*~*~*~*~*
More
from Seventh Dimension – The Door, a
Young Adult Christian Fantasy:
Magical
stirrings from deep within bubbled forth and overflowed. Freedom beckoned me.
I
countered their lies, “He’ll always live in my heart. You can’t hurt me anymore”...suddenly,
the demons began to shrink—smaller and smaller they became, right before my
eyes. As the underlings shrunk, they underwent a metamorphosis. They shrank
smaller and smaller and we grew larger and larger. Soon the underlings had
shapeshifted into nothing more than puny snakes. Even though they hissed,
their voices became as a little mouse’s before a taunting cat.
—Shale
Snyder, chapter thirty-five
*~*~*~*~*~*
Forgiveness is never easy. With great
forgiveness comes great grace. Great grace is never cheap. Jesus Christ paid
the ultimate price to forgive us by shedding his blood on the cross. We can’t
give him back his life—Christ willingly allowed himself to be crucified so that
he could give us eternal life. It was a choice he made. It’s a choice we must
make—the choice to forgive.
Sometimes
it requires a recommitment—as in my case, when I recommitted my life to Jesus
Christ. I knew I needed more faith to forgive. I was running on an empty gas
tank, and the only way to fill it up was to allow God’s Spirit to work in my
heart. I had to make a conscious choice to forgive my ex-husband. I had to ask
God to help me do it. I couldn’t do it on my own. I couldn’t conjure up enough
goodness within me to do it without his help.
God
is gracious and loving. We are forgiven by God, and we must extend that
forgiveness to others if we want to be like Jesus. If forgiveness was cheap, it
would not have cost Jesus his life. But our forgiveness couldn’t be bought with
anything less.
We
must lay down our rights, lay down our hurts, and lay down our desires to
retaliate. We might have to go back to God and ask for his help many, many
times to enable a lifetime of living in forgiveness. And each time we recognize
our need for him, he gives us everything we need to abide in him.
